The Intent of Love

The other day, a friend of mine complimented me for working so hard on my marriage.

I understood what he was trying to say and I was grateful for the compliment. I did, however, want to correct his slight misconception of how I try to live my life as a husband.

The misconception I want to correct, or at least refocus, is the idea of marriage being hard work.

I’ve had to work hard in my life (ok, not that much…but I really have). To me, hard work implies sweat and exertion. Hard work means being physically exhausted.

Being married to Jeannie isn’t that kind of hard work.

I am, however, intentional about being her husband. What does that mean?

First, it means paying attention.

I pay attention to Jeannie. I know how her day is going. I know what’s important to her at any given moment. I’m always looking for ways to support and encourage her in what’s she’s doing.

Second, it means anticipating.

If I see the week is difficult or crowded, I’ll plan a date for Friday night. For one thing, it gives us something to look forward to. And second, it allows us to push the world back and spend time with each other. I always try to be a little ahead of what Jeannie needs.

Third, I act.

Intentions without actions are worthless.

Yes, I buy flowers. Why? Because flowers are cheaper than attorneys.

I ask her out on dates. Why? Because she’s still my girlfriend.

I flirt with her all of the time. Why? Because, after all of these years, I’m still crazy about her and I intend to never let her forget it.